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About Artisan Crafts / Hobbyist Core Member See the universe in your heart..Female/Germany Groups :iconkiryuakiclub: kiryuakiclub
Kyosuke x Aki
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MONIKA | 27 | FEMALE


UNDER CONSTRUCTION





Pagedoll



<div align="Mewtonika pagedoll photo mewnika_page__doll2_by_shaylo_artistry-dau4wow_zpsxbyv53yx.gif
">



Free Stereo For Use by SmusheyCreations Await Free Stereo For Use by Smushey


Purple Points Free by XStuffedAnimalQueenXART STATUS Purple Points Free by XStuffedAnimalQueenX
Purple Butterfly Divider by CherushiMetsumari
Starting - Progress bar - Starting by xXNightcallerXx
Sketching - Progress bar - Sketching by xXNightcallerXx
Lining - Progress bar - Lining by xXNightcallerXx
Coloring - Progress bar - Coloring by xXNightcallerXx
Shading - Progress bar - Shading by xXNightcallerXx
Finished - Progress bar - Finished by xXNightcallerXx

Purple Butterfly Divider by CherushiMetsumari

UPCOMING ARTWORKS
Double Meme Progress bar - Starting by xXNightcallerXx
Monika "Johto Team" Progress bar - Starting by xXNightcallerXx
Monika "Alola Team" Progress bar - Starting by xXNightcallerXx
Upon the Wooden Bridge Progress bar - Coloring by xXNightcallerXx
Synchronicity Bonds Cover - Progress bar - Starting by xXNightcallerXx
Aysel and Kunai - Progress bar - Starting by xXNightcallerXx


Created by Spiceferret

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Crystal-Dream's Profile Picture
Crystal-Dream
See the universe in your heart..
Artist | Hobbyist | Artisan Crafts
Germany
Hello, I am Monika, or Crystal-Dream, or also known as JamaiDark from youtube.com.
I am a plushie knitter, love to draw my own manga called "Eternal Purity" and have also took a liking into fandubbing.
I am a fan of Sonic the hedgehog, but also like YuGiOh GX and 5Ds so much, as well as Neon Genesis Evangelion, Ghost in the Shell and some more.
Hope you enjoy your stay here. :)

My Girlfriend: :iconpuschelhuhn:

Pantheist Stamp by SqueezyBat Anti-anti-shipper by Lthecat

Polish language level EXPERT by TheFlagandAnthemGuy German Level Expert Stamp by Xenophilith USA Language Level stamp4 by Faeth-design French 3 by Faeth-design
[Comm.] MewtwoXMonika Stamp by TheKitsuneAlchemist [Comm.] ShadowXBriny Stamp by TheKitsuneAlchemist The Kitsune Alchemist Support Stamp by TheKitsuneAlchemist shadriny forever... by Shaylo-Artistry Jamai stamp by HeykeetheBat
Mewtwo stamp by PrinzeBurnzo Mega Mewtwo X by Marlenesstamps Gift : Mewtwo Stamp by Miss--Liberty Young Mewtwo Stamp by KaidaTheDragon Mewtwo Love Stamp by SquirtleStamps

Arukeni x Mummy stamp by LadyBeelze :Stamp: Arukenimon II by Bunloaf BlackWarGreymon Stamp by Thunderbirmon Lunamon Stamp by DrDoomy
STAMP: Glasses by Emotikonz Favorite Characters Stamp by Stamp221 Pikachu Stamp by Kezzi-Rose I Talk to Myself Stamp by Latias-Flyer Legendary Parade Stamp by The-Emerald-Otter
Fanartist Stamp by Feniiku Love Stamp by Kezzi-Rose Art Geek Stamp by xoxostudios German Shepherd Love Stamp by cloudrat Why I boycotted fandoms. by lostforeveragain
Team Valor Pokemon GO stamp by Star121 Jonton Stamp by FliteWulf FRIENDS STAMP by emo-city Celebi Fan Stamp by Skymint-Stamps Celebi x Mew stamp (late birthday gift) by MandolinC

Shadriny Fan Button by Shaylo-Artistry Briny Fan Button by Shaylo-Artistry

Made for me:
Mewtonika Fan Button by Shaylo-Artistry Mewtonika Forever by Shaylo-Artistry

Favourite genre of music: Dance/Trance/House
Operating System: Windows Vista
Favourite cartoon character: Mewtwo, Kiryu, Yubel, Aki, Juudai, Arukenimon and Mummymon
Personal Quote: See the universe inside your heart..

Secondary account: thesecretgalaxy (DON'T go there if you can't bear Yaoi/Yuri)
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Merry Christmas to Everyone!

Sat Dec 24, 2016, 1:31 PM
  • Listening to: my IPod
  • Reading: raisedbynarcissists on reddit
  • Playing: Pokemon Moon
  • Eating: Christmas food


I want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas, wherever you are! Or, if you don't celebrate christmas, I wish you happy Holidays!

Aside from that, we are pretty close to the end of this year, and when I look back at 2016, it can really go and die in a fire. While I was able to move out around April of 2016, I already lost my supporting job in September, which really put a dent in my already barely-existent self-confidence.
The worst feeling of all is that I seem to have drifted apart from everyone and secluded myself when what I really crave is connection.
I want my life to move forward, but I don't know into which direction. I wanted to make a PhD, but heck, we see how that went, so I am afraid now to try again. So afraid of failure that it paralyzes me. While I know that I need and have to try again, I don't know how to overcome this paralysis. Or how to overcome my dark thoughts, which include thoughts of suicide as well - and maybe these would be better kept in secret, but I am tired of keeping all of this inside me. If I do that any longer, I will drown for sure.

The biggest decision that I had to face and which I still wasn't able to resolve is the thing about Canada... I could go back to Vancouver and make my PhD there, but that would mean moving away 6000 kilometres for 3-4 years. I feel so much obligation for so many people to just up and leave though. While it is my biggest wish to just GO, I feel bound. I can't leave my brother with my NPD-disordered mother. I think of it as my obligation to be there for him - which I can't be when I am 6000 kilometres away in Canada. If something happened to my brother in Germany, I wouldn't know how to live with it.
Also, my grandmother.. and the fucked up situation I describe down below. I feel like I can't leave her either.
I don't know what to do. I have already shed so many tears, and just thinking of this decision I have to face is bringing new tears to my eyes again. I don't know how to decide, and what would speak for going or against it. What would be the logical thing to do? Or is it better to follow my heart?
Or is what seems to be "obligation" to me just an excuse to run away and give up my dreams?
My heart has been broken over this for a duration of months, and I can't seem to find the answer. Time is running out anyway. If I can't provide the documents to the University in Vancouver by the end of February, I will have missed my chance anyhow.


What also has been crazy in this year is my situation with my extended family. My mother plans on sueing my grandmother for half of her house and plans on kicking out my grandmother and above all, my uncle who lives with my grandmother. My mum hates my uncle and wishes to destroy him in any way she can. So yeah... 2017 will be a rough start for sure when I am reminded of this situation...

If I can utter some wishes I have for the next year though,  it would be these:

I want to finally find my place in this crazy world.
I want to have a job I like and that I can feel secure in.
I want to finally learn to love myself.

I am really thankful for each and everyone of you who has listened to me so far and has stayed by my side. It means so much to me that you are willing to be there for me when I need it.

What is it that you hope for in the next year?

Is there anything you want to know about me? 

100%
3 deviants said I want to write a FAQ
0%
No deviants said So please comment

Comments


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:iconlucasfan375:
Lucasfan375 Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist Filmographer
Hey, what's up buddy?
Reply
:iconcrystal-dream:
Crystal-Dream Featured By Owner 12 hours ago  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Nothing much. I could hardly draw anything, but this is because I have to write up a report until Monday.
Reply
:iconlucasfan375:
Lucasfan375 Featured By Owner 12 hours ago  Hobbyist Filmographer
Oh, god. That sounds like fun.
Reply
:icontanner28:
Tanner28 Featured By Owner 3 days ago
I have to ask now, do you offer commissions?
Reply
:iconcrystal-dream:
Crystal-Dream Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
I mostly take plush comissions, but if you are talking about drawing comissions, I could do that too.
Reply
:icontanner28:
Tanner28 Featured By Owner 3 days ago
Very cool and I'm glad I asked! (lol though, now I just have to save up some money ^_^U )
Thank you for your time and the replies. It's appreciated. :heart:
Reply
:iconshaylo-artistry:
Shaylo-Artistry Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2017  Professional General Artist
Reply
:iconshaylo-artistry:
Shaylo-Artistry Featured By Owner Edited Dec 24, 2016  Professional General Artist
Jetzt bist du wieder core :highfive:
Und vielen Dank für meine Verlängerung :)
Reply
:iconcrystal-dream:
Crystal-Dream Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2016  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Danke sehr! :D Vielleicht sollte ich meine Seite für die Zeitspanne ein bisschen aufhübschen. Mit pagedolls und so? auch wenn ich nicht weiß, wie ich die machen soll.
Reply
:iconshaylo-artistry:
Shaylo-Artistry Featured By Owner Dec 24, 2016  Professional General Artist
Ja das solltest du ^^
Ich kann dir eine machen, wenn ich zeit habe :)
Reply
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